Slim Whitman Invitational
2013 Champ - Bobby
For more information contact the Webmaster
Home | Invitational | Fall Classic | Western
This text was verbalized at the CHAMPS Handicap Presentation on 6/11/14. It shall be recorded as
The 2013 Champ’s Letter. The CHAMP withheld publication of the letter till now hoping to entice more Slimers to attend the great event in anticipation of hearing these hallowed words in person.
• I’m tired of those ‘SLIMERs’ who type a good game but rarely participate.

• I’m tired of those ‘SLIMERs’ who are quick to criticize SLIMERs who attend but never show their ass on site.

• ...And I’m tired of those SLIMERs who hover in the wings, chastising those, who day in and day out, get up at the ‘crack’ (easy SMURF) of dawn, head pounding like a Hooker on payday, taking in the fresh smell of the steaming La Brea Tar Pit sulfur coming out of each and every Fireside bathroom, all in preparation for the Death March to the marshalling point at that first tee where they begin another day of battle.

These are the brothers I write to. These are the men I come for. And these are the only ones privileged to hear these hallowed words in person, THIS BAND OF BROTHERS.

That is my letter, right or wrong, early or late; it came from the heart for the good of my Brothers. I plead for leniency but will accept any punishment this esteemed Committee sees fit. All I ask is that your punishment, fairly meted out, benefits this BROTHERHOOD.